Grandparents & Memories
Herbert Christopher Pemberton Barker: Ladysmith, 1900 I missed out on grandparents through childhood and adolescence. Two were dead before I was born; a third was alienated by a quarrel that divided the family; only my mother's father was present in family life. Granddad Moore would come for Christmas and on odd visits to see us during the year. He said nothing about the seven operations under chloroform to save his leg, nearly lost in the trenches; and never mentioned his dead wife. He was avuncular and kind; and would tip my brother and I half-a-crown apiece as he left. My mother said grandma Moore would have loved me. The thought of love I might have had deepened my unspoken awareness of absence and loss. Now I'm a grandfather myself and have many friends with grandchildren, I understand better the warmth, care and family stories my grandparents might have given me. Important links with ancestors were lost with their deaths, leaving survivors as isolated individuals, self-...